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Writing In Suburbia #3: Hippie Dippy Mind/Body Sh*t

Hello!

Time for a new podcast episode of Writing In Suburbia! This episode is all about taking care of your body, as well as your mind, because pro writing is a marathon, people, not a sprint.

I also go off a little about how sick I am of bigots on Facebook. They suck.

Enjoy!

Writing In Suburbia #2: Death By Taxes!

Howdy, Y’all!

Time for another episode of Writing In Suburbia. This week’s episode is about the importance of paying attention to your taxes. Seriously.

Of course, I make the topic fun. No, I don’t. That’s a lie. Taxes are never fun. But they are important. Have a listen. It could save you some heartbreak and headaches.

Also, I mock John Green for being in Paris. Not really. Good for John Green being in Paris. I envy that bastard some days.

And, since this is about everyday life, I explain the importance of mowing my lawn. Good times.

Feel free to comment or send in questions via email or tweet. Word!

Enjoy!

Friday Night Drabble Party!

[Edit: Apparently the funding site Tamiko used does not allow legal defense funds. I am waiting to hear what the new site will be. I’ll keep y’all posted and change the links as soon as I know.]

Okay, so before I dive into the free drabble, which there will be one, I need everyone to take a look at something. I’m serious. This is no BS, people. Each week I give you free fiction, asking nothing in return, all for the enjoyment of you, my readers.

Now I’m asking for something back.

This is real world shit. I’m not asking you to buy my books or asking you to do anything for me. I’m asking you to give a little to help fight a severe injustice that has occurred.

Please read this and then give what you can. I have known Tamiko for years and she is one of the kindest, most generous people in Asheville. She has helped this community so much that to even think of anyone treating her with anything other than complete respect is just mind boggling. This is another example of law enforcement in our country believing they can get away with anything they want. This can’t stand.

Help Tamiko fight this.

Help us all fight this.

Thank you.

Now, on to the free fiction.

***

All At Fault
By
Jake Bible

“What am I accused of?” the young man asked, but the guards refused to respond.

They dragged him down the dark corridor, his feet skidding and scuffing as he tried to fight them; their steel-toed boots clomping and echoing as they continued their progress, unfazed by his weak protestations.

“What am I accused of?” the young man yelled as he was thrown into the room. The door slammed without an answer. “I’m innocent!”

“There are no innocent,” a voice said from the far corner. The room smelled of feces and piss. “We are all at fault. All of us.”

***

Thank you.

Disclaimer: Help Tamiko!

Friday Night Drabble Party!

Friday! Night! Drabble! Party!

Once again, I present you with some most excellent micro-fiction!

But, before you have a read, maybe you’d like to check out the post I dropped yesterday about all my recent, current, and upcoming releases? Mmmmm? You would? Excellent!

CLICK HERE!

Now, enjoy the drabble!

***

Little Rabbit
By
Jake Bible

A kick to the nuts and Walker is down, his hands instinctively going for his crotch, wanting to comfort and protect the already swelling testicles. But the second kick, the one to his ribs, stops everything.

Except for the vomiting. No way for that to stop. Nothing on God’s green earth could stop that. Vomit gonna happen.

When he’s done expelling his sick across the concrete, his body shuddering from the last convulsion before curling into a fetal position, that’s when Monica kneels down and grabs him by the hair.

“Should have run, little rabbit,” she sneers. “Should have run.”

***

Cheers!

Disclaimer: VOMIT GONNA HAPPEN!

So Much Going On- New Releases, Recent Releases, Upcoming Releases!

Howdy!

So, as I sat down this morning to start writing Z-Burbia 6: Rocky Mountain Die, I realized that I have had a LOT of comments/emails/messages asking when not only Z6 will be coming out, but also Mega 4, the next Kaiju novels, and the audiobooks for Metal & Ash and Mega 3.

Being the pure genius that I am, I decided I should list this shit for y’all!

BEHOLD! MY LIST(S) OF POWER! GAZE UPON THEIR MIGHTY MIGHTINESS!

Recent Releases-

In-Perpetuity-ebook-coverAh, In Perpetuity, my trouble child. This puppy is a mix of Starship Troopers and Full Metal Jacket. With that type of description, you can probably guess there might be some profanity. There is. After all, it is a Jake Bible novel. Unfortunately, some scifi readers turn into gremlins if they read profanity after midnight. Who knew? This book is not for you if you can’t handle the realistic portrayal of the dehumanizing effect severely harsh language can have on space cadets. Just move along, folks. You probably don’t want to read this at all.

 

 

ScareScapes_1_ebookScareScapes2_ebook_cover9781618685230_FChigh copyAttack_of_the_Living_Shadows_EbookCoverOn the opposite end of the profanity spectrum, I give you my middle grade scifi/horror series: ScareScapes!

Books 1 and 2 are available as ebooks now with Book 3 coming at the end of this month and Book 4 soon behind (I guess this falls into the recent release and soon to be released category). No profanity! Entirely profanity free! Also, full of heart pumping action, some good age-appropriate scares, a great mystery, and a diverse cast of young characters that should give every child between the ages of 8 and 12 a story to relate to. Perfect summer reading while traveling!

New Releases-

anti2!“The Sicklands are burning.
Coffin Squad, a mix of GenWrecks and GenSOF operators, races from GenWreck base to GenWreck base, only to find death and destruction. The abominations of the Sicklands -the cooties- have systematically destroyed everything they have come across, all in the name of an entity that no one can find- the Other.
Now Coffin Squad, with the help of some unlikely allies, must leave the Sicklands and dive back into the Clean Nation stronghold of Caldicott City in a desperate attempt to keep GenSOF Command intact. Mysteries greet them, hordes of diseased citizens attack them, and one person shatters their perception of what it means to live in a world post-antibiotics.
And it all leads back to the Other and the place where everything started- Control.”

Yep, the second book in my AntiBio series is out! This actually wraps up the series. Time to move on to greener pastures. I have a few other books to write, so capping this off felt good. I think fans of the first one will dig it.

 

 

11304373_1102912759724083_1715420103_oOh, and I’m also in a new ebook anthology by the Simon & Schuster imprint, Atria Books. Anything But Zombies is exactly that: horror stories that include anything but zombies. I have a great piece of satire in there that y’all will like. Go grab a copy ASAP! DO IT NOW!

 

 

 

 

Upcoming Releases-

I’m just gonna list these here. I’m not giving specific dates because I work in the small press world and release dates are subject to change and interpretation rather quickly. Plus, shit happens, people. Always remember that. Best laid plans and all that jazz.

Z-Burbia 6: Rocky Mountain Die– Late June/Early July

Kaiju Inferno (Kaiju Winter series book 3)- Mid to Late July

Mega 4: Behemoth Island– August

Dead Team Alpha 2: The Stronghold– September

Kaiju Fall (last book in the Kaiju Winter series)- October

Mega 5: subtitle to be decided– November

Mega 3 Audiobook- July

Metal & Ash Audiobook- July/August

Other Audiobooks?- Damn fine question. I’m working on the schedule to narrate/produce them myself. Stay tuned.

Possible New Stuffs-

Now, here is the juicy news you have been waiting for. Yes, you have!

I’ve been working hard to secure a new literary agent. I have also been submitting some project ideas on my own to publishers, both prose and graphic novel. Not to mention that I still plan on working with Severed Press for as long as they will have me.

What does this all mean? It means I have many ideas I’m juggling right now and it’s a matter of seeing which ones fall first before I announce my next projects. However, I can give some hints as to what direction I am thinking of going.

More Mega!- Hells to the yes, people! I could write Team Grendel novels forever, really. Just crank those puppies out and keep that core group of rabid fans happy. It’s always a good idea to keep rabid fans happy.

Sisters of the Apocalypse– This is an idea that has been brewing for a while. There’s a lot of apocalypse to go around, so no need to have Z-Burbia hog it all. But, damn if there aren’t some great characters in the Z-Burbia universe. Namely: Elsbeth. That’s right, folks! I may be giving Elsbeth her own spin-off series. How ya like dem apples?

Unnamed Scifi/zombie series– Not going to go into detail here until I have things squared away, but just know this will be beyond fun and filled with some great action, horror, snark, and all the Jake Bible goodness you’ve come to expect.

Audiobooks!- I will be narrating/producing my own audiobooks from here on out (except for Z-Burbia and Mega). That means I have to carve out that time. Be prepared for batch releases. Gonna be tricky, but damn if audiobooks don’t sell! I have the skill set to narrate and produce them myself, so no need to split royalties if I don’t have to.

A Podcast?- Yep, I may be getting back into podcasting. I’ve tried blogging on my website, I’ve tried being that Twitter guy, I have even tried the Facebook personality thing, but none of it seems to be me. What is me? Talking. Yes, I know it’s hard to believe, but I have a gift for gab. Put a mic in front of me and I can blab on for hours. But, I won’t make anyone suffer through hours of blabbing. What I am considering doing is just a quick hour podcast each week where I talk about being a full-time writer while also living the suburban life. I’ll talk about the craft and at the same time talk about how I work in the everyday chores of family living into my career and work schedule. There are a lot of writing blogs and podcasts, but very few that actually dive into how it affects basic life and what it’s like to be a full-time writer that isn’t living the New York literary life. Stay tuned!

And that’s it, folks. That’s what’s happen’. Keep your eyes peeled and your ears perked, because there will be plenty of announcements in the next few weeks and months.

Cheers!

 

 

 

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