O! M! G! It’s Halloween AND the Friday Night Drabble Party!
Got to calm down, got to calm down, got to- HALLOWEEN! I love it, I love it, I love it!
Know what else I love? Dead Mech on sale for $.99! (Segue for the mofo win, yo!) If you haven’t read my zombies/mechs/zombies in mechs mash-up then go spend a dollar and get you some seriously fun post-apocalyptic goodness! Clicky linky here!
Oooh, wait, there’s more! And this novel is actually Halloween themed! Be sure and check out Intentional Haunting, my latest release. It’s Teen horror, so kinda a mix of John Green and Stephen King in that classic Jake Bible style y’all love so much! Clicky another linky here!
Now, how’s about we get on with the Halloween drabble?
The Darkness Thirsts
“I SUMMON THEE, SATAN! SHOW ME YOUR DARK MAJESTY! GRACE US WITH YOUR EVIL PRESENCE!”
“Who dares summon me?” the Devil asked as he appeared in a puff of smoke in the center of the abandoned church.
“It is I, Master!” the man in the robes replied. “Your humble servant and-.”
“Sweet. Get me a latte from Starbucks, servant. Whole milk, two shots of vanilla. No cinnamon or nutmeg. NO CINNAMON OR NUTMEG!”
“God, I love Halloween,” the Devil sighed as the robed man hurried from the church and out to his Prius. “Free lattes rock.”
Disclaimer: If the Devil asks you to get him a latte, don’t get the two shots of vanilla. The guy is diabetic and in denial. Don’t be an enabler.
Another Friday is upon us! LET THERE BE DRABBLE!
Sooooooo, how’s your week been? Mmm-hmm… Right… Really? With Kevin? You don’t say… Oh, now that’s just lazy.
Anyhoo, my week has been good. I’ve been writing the hell out of Reign of Four: III. That medieval space fiction is some fun stuff! Y’all are gonna dig it when it comes out next year!
Know what else you’re gonna dig? A drabble!
Let’s get to it!
Not In A Row
“I just sign?” Victor asked.
“On the dotted line, baby,” Mr. Hob grinned. “Then you get to live a million days.”
“No tricks, right?” Victor frowned.
Mr. Hob snapped his fingers. “Nope.”
Victor hesitated then pierced his fingertip and signed.
“There,” Victor smiled. “Done!”
He stood there for a second then grabbed his chest and collapsed.
“What…?” Victor gasped.
“Right,” Mr. Hob smiled. “I never said the days would be in a row. Hopefully you wake up before they bury you.”
Mr. Hob walked off, a skip in his step, a whistle on his lips, another soul in his pocket.
Disclaimer: Don’t go down to the crossroads and try to flag a ride.
Another Friday means another Drabble Party!
And, as promised, all the October drabbles will be Halloween themed!
Speaking of Halloween, I know you’ll be busy on the 31st, but for those of you that don’t have plans on the 30th, you should come to Malaprop’s Bookstore here in Asheville, NC and see me read and sign Little Dead Man! There’ll be candy! And raffles for a chance to win the Ultimate Halloween Basket and a chance at Jake Bible novels for life! Gonna be a blast!
Would love to see ya there!
Now, on to the drabble!
More Than Apples
The apples floated in the tub, their skins striated with streaks of red and pink and yellow.
The apples bobbed up and down, up and down, as the tub was jostled this way and that.
The apples slammed to the bottom of the tub as the head was dunked.
The apples rolled about the head and came back up, ready to bob, bob, bob some more.
The apples were lost in the tub once the blood began to pour, lost in a small pool of deep crimson.
The apples were no longer all that floated and bobbed in the tub.
Disclaimer: Bobbing for apples is gross, people. Just gross. Don’t do it.
Oh, yeah, it’s Party time!
But, I don’t have much time because I gots to be writing/editing my middle grade scifi/horror series! Yes, folks, you heard that right, I’m writing for the kiddies!
I WILL WARP THE MINDS OF EVERY GENERATION!
I think your kids will dig the new series. It’s Goosebumps meets the Scooby Gang set in deep space! Huzzah!
Now, on to the drabble!
Beware The Moors!
“BEWARE THE MOORS!” the old man cried.
“Does he mean the swamps?” I asked my companion.
“The swamps?” my companion replied.
“Well, yes, swamps. Are not moors a type of swamp?”
“BEWARE THE MOORS!” the old man cried again before pissing himself.
“Well, that’s unfortunate,” my companion said. “Shall we go?”
“But what about the moors? Are they swamps or not?”
“They can be made of wetlands, but are primarily grasslands like highland savannas.”
“BEWARE THE MOORS!”
The ghostly apparitions rode towards us with their scimitars swinging in the foggy night.
“Oh, those Moors.”
Disclaimer: BEWARE THE MOORS!
FREE DRABBLES FOR ALL!
That’s my philosophy. I know I missed last week, but that’s because I actually went on vacation over Labor Day weekend. Crazy, right? I got to check out Georgetown, SC. Talk about a hidden bit of American history. I had no clue how prominent that place was during the 19th and early 20th centuries.
Know what else is prominent? CANNIBALS! Okay, okay, it’s a shitty segue, but what are ya gonna do?
Z-Burbia 4: Cannibal Road is available as an ebook (with print coming soon)! Z4 keeps the story of the Stanfords, and all of those from Whispering Pines, rolling on down the road. If you liked the last three Z-Burbia’s then you will love this one! And check out the cover! That’s a sweet cover!
But first here’s a link to Mega 2: Baja Blood in audiobook form! ZING!
Now, on to the drabble!
Everything In Its Place
There are fewer things in life more frustrating than not having the right size container when you need it. You spend a lifetime collecting jugs and boxes, trunks and barrels, jars and crates.
Then you look and it’s not there. It should be, a coffin is hard to misplace. It’s not like it’s an old mint tin or empty vial. It’s a bloody freakin’ coffin!
So, you dig. You know where an extra is. It may have had contents in it at one time, but surely Nature has claimed them by now. Two more shovelfuls and you’ll know for sure.
Disclaimer: You can never have enough extra containers, people.