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Friday Night Drabble Party!

Hello!!!

I would like to warmly welcome you back to another Party! Help yourself to some Drabbles and don’t be self-conscious if you read some of the backlog. Binging Drabbles is good for one’s health! SCIENCE!

Just a little heads up that Z-Burbia 4: Cannibal Road is now in audiobook form! Click away and get your copy at Audible.com. As soon as it’s up on Amazon and iTunes, I will let ya’ll know.

Now to the drabble!

Enjoy!

***
The Foul Things
By
Jake Bible

Carlos hated pickles. Dill, sweet- he couldn’t stand the foul things.

So, to be trapped in a convenience store with pickle juice dripping off the shelf onto his head, while being shot at, was the ultimate insult.

“Come on, Carlos! We don’t have all day! Give us the food and we’ll just go our separate ways!”

Carlos hated that voice as much as he hated pickles.

“Bite me, Lyle!” Carlos yelled. He refused to tell the man that there was no food left, just disgusting pickles. The principle of post-apocalyptic scavenging had to be upheld. “Go raid somewhere else!”

***

Cheers!

Disclaimer: You’re a disclaimer!

Friday Night Drabble Party!

Aaaaaaannnnnnnd IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII-eeeeee-IIIIIIIIIII-eeeee-IIIIIIIIIIII will always love Draaaaaaaaabbbbbbblllle! Will always love Draaaaaaabbbbbblllle! Will always love-. No, wait, put the shtogun down! NO! PLEA-!

*annnnd scene*

Thank you, thank you. Yes, that was my musical/dramatic interpretation of Quentin Tarantino’s The Drabbleguard.

Happy Friday, Mother F$*&ers!

Soooo, how’s it going? Ready for some free micro-fiction? Well, then let’s get to it!

Enjoy!

***

Major Break

By

Jake Bible

The microphone was kicked from the stage as the pop star moved forward, her face passive, serene.

The crowd screamed, their eyes wide with horror and disbelief as their idol turned on them, came at them.

Another shot rang out and another. The blood spray covered the first two rows of spectators as security guards collapsed, and the screams intensified, doubled, tripled. More shots. Again and again. More blood.

The pop star jumped off the stage and rolled, taking aim at the crowd once again. She emptied the magazine, so glad to finally give in to the madness. So glad.

***

Cheers!

Disclaimer: Gargle. Always gargle.

 

Friday Night Drabble Party!

YO! It’s Friday Night! There be a Drabble in this Party!

Not only is there a drabble, but there’s a link to the newly released Mega 3: When Giants Collide! Let’s see that beautiful bean footage!

Mega-3-ebook-coverYeah, baby! Ain’t that pretty! Feel free to clickety clik that pic and go get ya some Team Grendel! Hooyah!

Now, on to the drabble!

Enjoy!

***

Pitiful Creature

By

Jake Bible

“The interesting thing is how the creature reacts to various stimuli,” Dr. Roberts said. “Observe.”

The doctor threw a lit bag of feces into the cage.

“Dude!” the creature shouted. “What the hell, man? Is that poo? Why the hell are you throwing flaming poo at me?”

“It has become irritated,” Dr. Roberts observed. “It uses it’s primitive language to express that irritation.”

“Irritation? Dude, I’m pissed! That’s gross!” the creature exclaimed.

“Now, let’s see how it reacts when we expose it to raw uranium,” Dr. Roberts said.

“What? DUDE! NO URANIUM!”

“Pitiful,” one of the observers said. “So pitiful.”

***

Cheers!

Disclaimer: NO URANIUM!

 

Halloween Night Drabble Party!

O! M! G! It’s Halloween AND the Friday Night Drabble Party!

Got to calm down, got to calm down, got to- HALLOWEEN! I love it, I love it, I love it!

Know what else I love? Dead Mech on sale for $.99! (Segue for the mofo win, yo!) If you haven’t read my zombies/mechs/zombies in mechs mash-up then go spend a dollar and get you some seriously fun post-apocalyptic goodness! Clicky linky here!

Oooh, wait, there’s more! And this novel is actually Halloween themed! Be sure and check out Intentional Haunting, my latest release. It’s Teen horror, so kinda a mix of John Green and Stephen King in that classic Jake Bible style y’all love so much! Clicky another linky here!

Now, how’s about we get on with the Halloween drabble?

Enjoy!

***

The Darkness Thirsts

By

Jake Bible

“I SUMMON THEE, SATAN! SHOW ME YOUR DARK MAJESTY! GRACE US WITH YOUR EVIL PRESENCE!”

“Who dares summon me?” the Devil asked as he appeared in a puff of smoke in the center of the abandoned church.

“It is I, Master!” the man in the robes replied. “Your humble servant and-.”

“Sweet. Get me a latte from Starbucks, servant. Whole milk, two shots of vanilla. No cinnamon or nutmeg. NO CINNAMON OR NUTMEG!”

“Uh…uh…yes, Master.”

“God, I love Halloween,” the Devil sighed as the robed man hurried from the church and out to his Prius. “Free lattes rock.”

***

Cheers!

Disclaimer: If the Devil asks you to get him a latte, don’t get the two shots of vanilla. The guy is diabetic and in denial. Don’t be an enabler.

New Release! Intentional Haunting!

Hey, Folks!

Just in time for Halloween, I bring you my latest Teen horror novel, Intentional Haunting!

Think of it as Stephen King for the John Green fans. Great stuff! So go ahead and click that link, have a read, and enjoy the spooky season!

IntentionalHaunting_EbookCover

Intentional Haunting (13+)-

Wyattsville, Oregon –The Most Haunted Place In America.

For fourteen year old Cotton Tennison, the Wyattsville ghosts are not the horrors he fears. The living are far more scary.

As the town outcast, Cotton suffers the abuse of his drunk father and the torment of the local bullies – a group known as the Red Meat Boys.

His only refuge is The Wyatt House, an abandoned house at the end of his street, a house filled with ghosts and specters that the town would prefer didn’t exist.

When several teenagers are brutally murdered, the town council decides to turn the Wyatt House over to a family of ghost hunters with questionable intentions. Here begins Cotton’s struggle to find a way to save the house, his ghostly friends, and the entire town before an evil force de-stroys them all.

Intentional Haunting is a Teen horror novel that mixes the tender macabre of Neil Gaiman’s The Graveyard Book, the suspense of Stephen King’s The Shining, and the dark humor of Tim Burton’s Beetlejuice. It is the personal story of a young man surviving the abuse of a town that has abandoned him, a young man that will be faced with a choice when the fate of Wyattsville rests in his hands. Will he be able to look beyond his resentment to save the town that has caused him such pain or will he walk away, just as the town walked away from him?

 

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