Blog Archives

Views From The Captain’s Chair! Episode Hiatus!

Captains ChairBlog

 

Ahoy, Mateys!

Yep, you read that title correctly. The blog will be on hiatus for a few weeks. Deadlines, am I right?

That and I’ll be taking the very first vacation my family has ever taken together. I shit you not. Sure, we’ve gone on “vacation”, but it has always been with extended family, to see extended family, to see friends, or for some specific reason or other.

This will be the first vacation where I’m with the wife and kids only. No one else. First time.

And we get to go see Vermont and Maine, which will be nice! Never been north of Pittsburgh, personally. On the East coast, at least. I grew up in Oregon, so I’ve been from BC to San Diego on the West coast. This should be fun!

But, taking this vacation means I’ll be behind with writing, so no time to bloggy blog until I get caught up. Looking like August or September. I’ll keep y’all posted!

Before I go let me thank each and every one of you for reading this blog, reading my books, and for just being awesome!

Rock on, rocking rockers! See ya in a few weeks!

 

Cheers!

Friday Night Drabble Party!

The Party has returned!

I’m sure everyone noticed there was no Drabble Party last week. 4th of July and all. Shit went boom. Plus there was cornhole. (Note to self: create new erotica genre that Amazon will ban called “Cornhole Boom”.)

But the drabbletasticness of Friday Night Drabble Party is back and better than ever! EVER!

So, sit back with your favorite summer beverage or winter beverage for you folks that live down under. Hell. I’m talking about you people that live in Hell. What? You thought I was talking about New Zealand? Y’all are drinking tea in New Zealand right now. I know that. Because stereotypes make the world go round, yo!

And a billion hamsters at the center of the Earth. They make the world go round too. I wonder what they drink? And since they are in the center, do they have summer or winter? Maybe they live in Hell…

AntiBio is on sale for $.99! Buy it!

What was I talking about?

Right. Drabble.

Enjoy!

***

Little Things
By
Jake Bible

It’s the little things that make up this insane world.

Not the big things like food, air and water. No, we shit on those. They obviously don’t matter.

No, sir, life is made up of little things.

A wise man once said, “Don’t sweat the little things because it’s all little things.”

I think it was Snoopy that said that.

So, as I stand here on this ledge, looking down at the ants below -the little things-  and I can’t but wonder how not to sweat them. Wise words are good and all, but some instructions would be nice too.

***

Cheers!

BUY ANTIBIO! $.99!

Disclaimer: Don’t sweat it, it’s all good.

Friday Night Drabble Party!

Well, hello there! Back for some more Drabble Party action? Oh, hells to the yes you are!

Not gonna pimp any books or audiobooks tonight. But I will point you to a guest blog post that Starla Huchton wrote for Views From The Captain’s Chair! If you are a writer and want to know a little about some serious internet marketing campaign fu, then have a read. It’s good stuff.

Now, on to the drabble!

Enjoy!

***

All About The Rules
By
Jake Bible

 

“It doesn’t specifically say that I’m disqualified if I kill the other contestants,” Jaime smiled. “Read the rules. Sure, I can be arrested, but you can’t disqualify me.”

“It clearly states that if you break any local, state, or federal laws then you are out,” Morgan said, tapping the clipboard that was always clutched in his hands. “Just because you are the last one left alive, does not mean you automatically win.”

“But I haven’t broken any laws until I’m convicted,” Jaime insisted. “Innocent until proven guilty.”

“He’s right,” Stanford sighed. “Give him the damn trophy. Then call the cops.”

***

Cheers!

Disclaimer: Sometimes it’s more about the spirit of the thing.

Friday Night Drabble Party!

Who is ready to Party? YOU ARE!

No, seriously, you are. Ahhh, come on. Party. There’s a free Drabble in it for ya.

There ya go!

Friday Night Drabble Party is ready to rock this planet across the Milky Way! Or something like that.

But, before we get to that interstellar rocking, how about I make a couple of announcements?

Z-Burbia 3: Estate of the Dead is now available as an audiobook on Audible, Amazon, and iTunes! Go get some of that audio goodness!

The other announcement is that Little Dead Man is available for pre-order! That’s right, you can order the trade paperback right now, lock in that early bird savings, and then it will be delivered to your door on July 15th! Or something like that. Click the link or here and you can choose your retailer! THE FUTURE IS NOW!

Word!

Now to the drabble!

Enjoy!

***

Corner Market
By
Jake Bible

Corner market. Sitting there like a hollow tumor, sick and dying.

The last remnants of the city, left alone to rot and sag.

The tinkle of glass and a small cry. Silence follows. Desperate silence. Pleading, begging silence.

Nothing.

A shuffle of footsteps, an angry whisper, the hint of a face. Watching, waiting, praying.

A howl.

A whimper.

No hint of a face. More shuffling footsteps. A door opens, a door closes.
Silence.

A howl.

Feet slapping on ancient, cracked pavement.

A howl.

Feet stopping, body quivering, mouth salivating.

Corner market. Sitting there like a lunchbox, waiting to be opened.

***

 

Cheers!

Disclaimer: Careful where you shop.

Friday Night Drabble Party!

Heeeeeelllllllllooooooooooo, Friday! Time to get our Drabble Party on!

Free micro-fiction for you and me, baby! Ahhhhhhh, yeah!

But, before we get into the drabbletasticness, let’s talk about Little Dead Man!

That’s right, I have a new novel out! This one is by Permuted Press and is my YA debut. I kid you not, folks, it is Jake Bible goodness for the WHOLE family (if your family is 12 and up)! If you love my novels then you’ll love this one!

What’s it about? Have a read:

LDM Cover

Decades after the zombie apocalypse, seventeen year old Garret Weir just wants to be a normal teenager. As if dealing with the zombies isn’t hard enough, his annoying twin brother refuses to leave him in peace. And it’s not like Garret can just go to his room and shut the door to get away. His brother Garth is a zombie and conjoined to the top of Garret’s spine. Good times.

Forced from his hidden, mountain compound, Garret must learn who to trust and who to fear as he and Garth are thrust into a world more horrific than anything they could imagine. Fighting for their lives in a foreign landscape, the brothers head north to find their father who may have the answer to the deadly virus that caused the zombie apocalypse. Along their way they meet new friends, learn betrayal the hard way, fight for their mother’s life, run from deadly enemies, and discover that life may have seemed difficult before, but can always get a whole lot worse.

A fast-paced, high-action novel that doesn’t pull any punches, Little Dead Man is a surprisingly sweet story of two brothers – one living, one undead – that struggle with a mother that is mentally unstable, a missing father that has kept too many secrets, and a lie their parents have always told – that they are the last survivors on Earth. When the truth of that lie is revealed, Garret and Garth quickly find out that having other survivors in the world isn’t exactly a good thing. In fact, it’s quite deadly.

What do you think? Crazy cool, right? Right. What’s that? You’d rather have the print version? Well, that will be available very soon! July 15th, in fact! Feel free to pre-order that puppy by clicking on teh same link and choosing the paperback option!

Now, on to our drabble!

Enjoy!

***

Coin Flips, Man
By
Jake Bible

Two doors.

A choice.

“One could be my girlfriend, right?” the young man asked.

“Yes,” the Council above the pit replied as one.

“And one is, like, what? A man-eating tiger? Those still exist? I thought with deforestation and crap there, like, weren’t any man-eating tigers left?”

“Choose!” the Council shouted.

“Jeez, chill, bras. This isn’t easy.”

He stood there facing the two doors and frowned.

“Anyone have a coin I could flip? Doesn’t have to be a quarter. Nickel will totally do.”

“Carl!” a woman’s voice rang out from behind one door. “Just pick a fucking door!”

***

Cheers!

GO BUY LITTLE DEAD MAN! DO IT!

Disclaimer: BUY LITTLE DEAD MAN!

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 3,663 other followers

%d bloggers like this: