Friday? Check! Night? Check! Drabble? Check! Party?
Well, you tell me. Is this a party or what? (Answer: it is.)
Welcome back, y’all!
Tonight I have a great drabble for you, but I also have the pleasure of announcing: Infinite Mayhem! Check it out!
You should really click that pic and get you a copy. You know you want more Roak!
Oh, and also, another Writing In Suburbia has dropped! Huzzah!
For those of you that are all about becoming indie authors, you should really listen to this one since I have had the great fortune of speaking with Brian Rathbone! Check it out, y’all! (And sorry for low sound during intro. There was a recording glitch and I did my best to boost the volume in post, but sometimes life doesn’t cooperate.)
Now, on with the drabble!
The safe was empty.
Norris crouched there, goggles pushed up onto his forehead, the smoke from the drill bit still in the air, and stared at the shelves that did not hold the cash as promised.
He gave the empty safe one last look then stowed his gear, threw the heavy pack onto his back, and left the office. He backtracked the way he came in, following the third floor hallway to the guest bedroom, through there and into the bathroom, stepped onto the toilet, and shoved the small window open.
The police were already waiting down below.
We meet again!
Welcome back to another Friday Night Drabble Party, y’all. Thanks for stopping by. Got some good stuffs for ya this week!
First, Max Rage: Intergalactic Badass! is on sale for $.99! Click the pic below and go get my satirical, humorous take on the macho tough guy scifi genre!
And, for those of you that dig videos filled with writing advice, I have a new episode out in my YouTube series. Have a looksee!
Oh, and I now have a Facebook Group set up! It’s a closed group, so you have to ask to join. This way FB can’t throttle my posts and fans/readers can see all the great announcements. Go ask to join so you can see what’s going on with Jake Bible Fiction!
Now, on with tonight’s drabble!
Work With That
“Dance, little imp! DANCE!” the Man in the Hood shouted at the creature trapped within the circle of salt.
“Not an imp,” the creature muttered under its breath as it began to hop back and forth from one foot to the other. “I’m a bugbear.”
The Man in the Hood raised a silver staff above his head, but paused halfway. “Say what now?”
“What?” the creature asked.
“You’re not an imp?”
“No, I’m a bugbear. Like a hobgoblin. I eat kids.”
“I need an imp.”
“You called a bugbear.”
“Shit… Eat kids, huh?”
“I can probably work with that.”
Disclaimer: Max Rage!
(I totally said that in an Alfred Hitchcock voice.)
Got a great drabble for you tonight, but first (#butfirst), how about you take a look at the wonder that is Four Weeks To Finished: How To Stop Making Excuses, Start Being Prolific, And Finish Your Novel!
Now an audiobook! Narrated by yours truly! (That’s me. I’m yours truly.)
If you’ve dug my podcast (Writing In Suburbia, yo!) then you’ll dig this helpful audiobook on how to be the most prolific writer you can be. Check it out, y’all!
How about a handy graphic to click on! Here ya go!
Woot to the woot!
Now, on with the drabble!
Enter a world where the inhabitants are completely unaware that every second of the day they are being watched! Join us now for tonight’s spectacle that is: Domestic Bliss!
“Lawrence? Have you seen the tape measure? It should be in the little tool box under the stairs,” Marge called.
Lawrence set his mug down, the coffee untouched. “It’s in there, Donna.”
“Where? It isn’t in here!”
Lawrence sighed and stood up. Once again he’d have to find the tape measure.
Thus ends tonight’s episode of: Domestic Bliss! Tune in tomorrow when we see if Donna ever finds the tape measure!
And the Lord said, “Let there be an audiobook of Four Weeks To Finished!”
And there was. And it was narrated by me!
That’s right, folks, I narrated Four Weeks To Finished and now it is available for your precious earholes to consume. Y’all should get to the clicking of the pic below and bask in the writing wisdom I have bestowed upon the masses. BASK!
Now, enjoy the drabble goodness!
To Your Left
“The peg to your left. Your left. To your left, Carl. YOUR LEFT!”
“Is that to your left?”
“No. This is my…right?”
“Yes, Carl, that’s your right. Which would make that peg the…?”
“The wrong peg! It’s the wrong peg, Carl! What happens if you pull out the wrong peg?”
“The temple collapses.”
“And what happens when the temple collapses?”
“If we’re lucky, yes, but what really happens is the ruins fill with swamp water and we drown.”
“I’d rather be crushed.”
“Wouldn’t we all.”
“So this peg?”
“No, Carl! To your left!”
One more week down! Getting closer to the End of Days, folks!
What? Oh, I’m kidding. How would I know when the End of Days is? I mean, it’s not like having the last name of Bible puts me in a special club or anything. I’m not building a bunker for my family in the mountains so it’s ready before January 18th, 2023. Why would I do something so very specific? Y’all are paranoid.
Hey! Who wants a drabble? You do!
Check out the drabble below and if you like what you read and want to support the author that wrote such a fine little nugget of fiction (me) then please click around the website for a bit. Also, review a book! Preferably one of mine, but you do you.
Oh, and check out my interview on the Unstructured podcast. You’ll dig it.
“Seven doors? There should be only two doors,” Dale stated.
“What?” the devil asked. “No, seven is our usual number.”
“Yeah, but The Lady and the Tiger,” Dale replied.
“What tiger? We don’t have tigers down here,” the devil said, annoyed.
“No, it’s a story,” Dale insisted, “with two doors.”
“Yeah, well, your story has seven doors. Pick one,” the devil snapped.
“I’m going to ignore five of the doors and just use those two,” Dale said.
“You realize it’s shit like this that got you down here in the first place, right?” the devil asked and rolled his eyes.
Disclaimer: January 18th, 2023…