Jake Bible Fiction

  • Views From The Captain’s Chair! Episode Three: Genre- The five-lettered four-letter word

    Captains ChairBlog

    Ahoy, Mateys!

    Welcome back aboard the Good Ship Jake! Today’s voyage will take you through a much maligned subject: genre!

    I know, I know, it’s been talked about. There’s the whole Literary Vs. Genre war going on. Which, to me is bullshit. There is no war. Never has been. There have just been egos flailing and screaming and crying and…well, you get the picture.

    Here’s the deal folks: Genre and Literary are the same thing. The only difference is where they are housed in the bookstore. And did you notice I said “bookstore” and not “library”? Yes, because librarians (or media specialists, as they are called today, and rightly so) are the fucking EXPERTS on books! Not bookstores, not colleges, not publishers or editors or professors or even writers. Librarians. And how do they classify books? Fiction and non-fiction.

    It’s that simple. There are fiction books and non-fiction books. And within fiction there is only one distinction: the alphabetical listing of authors’ last names. When you walk into a library you don’t go to the horror section or the WWI  angst section. You go to fiction and look up the author’s name and find that row of shelves. Boom! Books found, books grabbed, books checked-out.

    So simple, right? Sure, if you live your life in a card catalog. Uh, you do know what a card catalog is, right? Never mind. But we don’t live our lives in a world that is classified or defined by listings such as “F Bib”. We live in a messy world of opinions and double opinions and marketing and perception and inception and “Oh, you read that?” bullshit. We live in a world of egos.

    Let me give you an example: My son is on the high school debate team and I was recently a judge at one of the away tournaments. I met some other parents that were judging and we started chatting. They learned I was a writer (I didn’t just blurt it out, I actually dodged the subject for a bit, but that’s for another post) when I said that my wife and I help my son edit his cases. This turned into a conversation about how editing by another person is essential to good writing (which it is). Then the subject changed, we were called to our next debates, and on the day went.

    All peachy keen, right? Not so much. Later, when we got onto the bus to head back to Asheville, one of the parents asked what I write. I replied, “I write genre fiction. Horror, scifi, thrillers, adventure, pretty much whatever comes into my head and I can get a contract for.” Big smile on my face, ready to elaborate or not. The “or not” was quickly apparent as the parent’s face clouded over and she muttered, “oh” then turned around in her seat. WTF?

    It was strange because we’d had some great conversations earlier. Now I was persona non grata because it was revealed I write that “genre” stuff. Now, it isn’t a case of misinterpreting the response. I had a feeling I would get that response by at least one parent because of the way Asheville is. It can be a bit snobby when it comes to literature. After all, Asheville was the birth place of, home of, and inspiration to Thomas Wolfe. Plus, it’s where O. Henry is buried and Carl Sandburg lived. It was also a temporary home to the likes of F. Scott Fitzgerald (Zelda died here), Henry James, and Edith Wharton. Not to mention the area is currently the home to Charles Frazier (Cold Mountain), Sara Gruen (Water For Elephants), Gail Godwin (Father Melancholy’s Daughter), Ron Rash (Serena) as well as many acclaimed poets and essayists. That’s quite a pedigree for a small, southern city.

    So that experience went around and around in my mind until I decided to write this post. Why? Because I want others interested in being genre writers to not worry about the negatives and focus on the positives. Such as the fact that the most successful writers of our day are genre writers.  Stephen King, James Patterson, JK Rowling, Stephanie Meyer, Danielle Steele, Dean Koontz, and many more! Some of you will scoff at that list, but that’s your problem. I would kill to be on that list! [For future reference, I am kidding about the killing. I’d never do that. Plus, I have an alibi.]

    If you are a writer that wants to write the next “Great American Novel” then awesome! Bully for you! But, in this country, you already get validation. This also isn’t a post to validate current genre writers; y’all are already doing it and I applaud you! No, this post is for those writers that struggle with their true feelings and feel guilty for wanting to write stuff that’s not driven by an alcoholic protagonist depressed because he constantly gets a urinary infection after cheating on his wife. [Aside: Yes, that is an actual novel.]

    Don’t get me wrong, I love me some literature that is all intellectualized and whatnot. If the story in your head is about a woman dealing with the struggles of childbirth in rural Indiana while also flashing back to the past and her failed dreams of being a corporate lawyer then go for it! I just lean towards her also being a psychopath that kills off her competition at the local community college.

    And I could probably write a novel that has critics creaming in their corduroys, but that’s not me. I can’t spend years agonizing over my prose and worrying that my use of metaphor will be misunderstood. I write novels filled with explosions, blood, gore, guns, monsters, heroes, villains, zombies,  post-apocalyptic cannibals, and all that jazz! That’s what revs my engine and gets me sitting down in the ol’ captain’s chair!

    And if that’s what you love, what makes you laugh or smile when you read it, makes you hide under the covers or jump into your spouse’s lap, then don’t ignore those feelings. In fact, embrace them and take that energy and put it on the page. Let that passion drive your words, drive your characters, drive your story!

    Be the writer you are supposed to be, not the writer you think you’re supposed to be!

    Don’t worry about what others think; ignore the turned up noses; walk away from the snide remarks, the condescending snorts, the pretentious falderal. If your muse comes equipped with an AK-47 or happens to see dead people then that’s what you should be writing. The worst thing a writer can do is hide from her muse or ignore her gut. You are the writer, it’s your story, it’s your career, and it’s already hard enough without second guessing yourself!

    Don’t believe me? Then find an example you want to live up to. Neil Gaiman, Edgar Alan Poe, Dylan Thomas, Cormac McCarthy, Roald Dahl, Theodore Sturgeon, JG Ballard, Shirley Jackson and many more. I’m not saying you should emulate their lives since many of those writers had less than stellar endings. I am saying that you can aspire to be great and still be yourself.

    Personally, for me, I have no ego when it comes to my writing. I know what I write, I love what I write, and I only give a shit if my fans and readers love what I write. I know not every novel I write will be for everyone, and not every novel will be great, but I write what I’m inspired by and I don’t look back.

    So ignore the stigma that may come with “genre” writing. Give that shit the finger, a long raspberry, and show it some ass cheeks. At the end of the day all that matters is that you had fun writing what you wanted to and your readers had fun reading it. Write what you want and do what I do: don’t look back!

    Cheers!

    Disclaimer: Views From The Captain’s Chair are just that: views. These are not laws. These are not set in stone. I could be totally wrong. I could be off my rocker (shut up). I could be full of S-H-I-T. I could change my mind next week. All of that is possible. Who knows? But if even just a little of this helps you then I’m happy with that. If it just makes you stop and think then I’ve done my job. Which I really need to get back to. Blogging don’t pay for the bourbon! Oh, and the whole Captain’s Chair thing? Yeah, I write in a captain’s chair. It’s true, Mateys! Got a question? Need some one on one? Shoot me an email, a DM, a PM (no BMs) or comment below.

    Jake Bible lives in Asheville, NC with his wife and two kids.

    A professional writer since 2009, Jake has a proven record of innovation, invention and creativity. Novelist, short story writer, independent screenwriter, podcaster, and inventor of the Drabble Novel, Jake is able to switch between or mash-up genres with ease to create new and exciting storyscapes that have captivated and built an audience of thousands.

  • Views From The Captain’s Chair! Episode Two: You Will Learn Discipline, Maggot!

    Captains ChairBlog

    Ahoy, Mateys!

    Welcome to Episode Two of Views From The Captain’s Chair! Today is gonna be about some hard truths so hang on tight, it’s gonna be a bumpy ride! Or bumpy voyage, since we’re going with the “nautical” theme in this series. Oh, and speaking of nautical, go buy Mega! (Nailed it!)

    Last week we talked about perspective and why you shouldn’t ignore the advice of experienced writers when they tell you you won’t “get it ” as a writer until you have at least 4-5 years of experience under your belt. Haven’t read that? Go do it. DO IT NOW, MAGGOT!

    What? I can pull off the Drill Instructor thing. Yes, I can. I can too! SHUT UP, MAGGOT! …see?

    Do you have perspective now? Excellent, since today we will talk about the road you have to travel to get that perspective. Because unless you are actually writing for 4-5 years you won’t get that perspective. And when I mean writing I mean actually writing. Not talking about writing, not saying you’ll get to it one day, not writing an hour on the weekend when it’s convenient. Not reading blogs about writing (although that’s the sure way to success, am I right?), but actually planting your ass-cushion in your chair cushion and going all typey-typey on that bitch. Whatever that bitch may be: novel, screenplay, comic book script, short story, cookbook, whatevs, yo! (I promise not to say whatevs again. Sorry.)

    Before everyone gets their boxers/briefs/panties/leathers in a wad, I want to define a writer. A writer is anyone that writes. There. Done. Even if you only write for an hour on Saturday because that’s the only time you have then you are a writer. But this post isn’t for you. It’s for those that want to be professional writers. The ones that want to make money at it. The ones that want to do it full time and make a (meager) living like I do. That’s who I’m talking to. Everyone else can listen, but I don’t want to get into a debate about what “defines” a writer and all that ego blah blah blah. If you write, you’re a writer.

    But, because there are bills to pay, you can’t just hang up a shingle and say “Writer lives here. Pay me”. That doesn’t happen.  You have to actually write shit. And write shit people want to read. And write shit that publishers want to publish, or if you self-publish, an editor is willing to go over without throwing up. You have to do those things. And how do you get to that point? Discipline.

    Yep, I am now going to put my Mr. Miyagi headband on and grab my chopsticks, ’cause we got some flies to catch, yo! (I said I wouldn’t say whatevs again, but I didn’t say I wouldn’t say yo again, yo. Oh, I guess I said whatevs again also. And again! Dammit! Oh, well. This Doctor lies!)

    Discipline…

    I’m not going to define it. I’m just going to explain the discipline I employed to get where I am. Ready? Get a pad and paper or maybe a micro-recorder or, if you have a secretary/Jello wrestling slave handy, you can have he/she take shorthand notes for you. Got all that? Yes? Good. Here is what I did to get to being a full time writer:

    I fucking wrote. I wrote when I had time. I wrote when I didn’t have time. I pissed people off because I said I had writing to do instead of going out/cleaning the house/mowing the lawn/doing my day job/using the toilet. I wrote. And if anyone argued with me about it I said, “Only way I’m going to make it as a professional writer is to act like one and write”. Then I’d stick out my tongue and fling monkey poo at them. [Note to self: stock up on monkey poo.]

    Bam!

    It’s not much of a secret, and it’s been said by thousands of other authors (but not with my charm) and it’s the truth. You want to be a professional writer and make a living at it? Then you fucking write! You write, you write, you write! And you write when -wait for it- you DON’T WANT TO! You think I want to be here sitting in my captain’s chair and writing this? Well, yeah, I do, but that’s not the point! The point is I am sitting here writing! Not making up excuses not to write.

    Everyone has their process, I get that, but no writer has a process that doesn’t include the physical act of writing. And if one of you smart asses says “dictation software” I’ll taint punch you across the country to Cleveland (if you live in Cleveland then you’re safe). I don’t write a novel a month (yep, I do that) by watching Netflix all day. I only watch Netflix when I eat lunch. That’s discipline right there! I have the house to myself for about 6-8 hours a day, five days a week. I could totally be all Tom Cruiseing it in my tighty whiteys to Bob Segar for most of the day. But I sit my ass-cushion in my captain’s chair cushion and I write. [For the record I am a boxers guys. Be still your hearts, ladies. And gentlemen. I believe in Jake-lust equality.]

    And because I do that I get better. I get better.

    I get better because I force myself to write even when I don’t want to. And you know what? Once I get going, it ends up I do want to. And I should hope so or I’m in the wrong profession.

    So think about this for a few minutes. Let it set in. Listen whilst I hum Girl From Ipanema. Daaaa de-da de dada de-da de, daaaa de-da de dada de da-de, daaa de-da de-dada de-da-de do do. Ready? Cool.

    You have to write. Discipline as a writer means you sit down and you write. You ignore the Facebook/Twitter/Tumbsplotch/PownTube. You write. And keep writing until your head goes all assplodey. Boom! Then you can have your distractions (I call mine bourbon). That’s just the reality of the discipline of a writer. You don’t have the luxury of a boss looking over your shoulder or an office snitch like Loretta (Screw you, Loretta!) spying on you. You have to police yourself and put yourself in time out when you misbehave. And you know what you do when you are in time out? You write!

    Let me BAM again! Uh…BAM!

    So, if you have read Episode One: The Phantom French Tickler…no, wait, sorry, I…

    So if you have read Episode One: Do Your Time! and now Episode Two: You Will Learn Discipline, Maggot!, then you have two basic building blocks to becoming a full time writer. Good on you! What’s that? You don’t want to write full time? Then take my advice and just dial it back a notch. Up to you. Either way, the advice still stands.

    Or at least I think so!

    So stop reading this malarkey and get thee to your typowritoratus, MAGGOT!

    (I only call you maggot because it’s tough love and I care.)

    Cheers!

    Disclaimer: Views From The Captain’s Chair are just that: views. These are not laws. These are not set in stone. I could be totally wrong. I could be off my rocker (shut up). I could be full of S-H-I-T. I could change my mind next week. All of that is possible. Who knows? But if even just a little of this helps you then I’m happy with that. If it just makes you stop and think then I’ve done my job. Which I really need to get back to. Blogging don’t pay for the bourbon! Oh, and the whole Captain’s Chair thing? Yeah, I write in a captain’s chair. It’s true, Mateys! Got a question? Need some one on one? Shoot me an email, a DM, a PM (no BMs) or comment below.

    Jake Bible lives in Asheville, NC with his wife and two kids.

    A professional writer since 2009, Jake has a proven record of innovation, invention and creativity. Novelist, short story writer, independent screenwriter, podcaster, and inventor of the Drabble Novel, Jake is able to switch between or mash-up genres with ease to create new and exciting storyscapes that have captivated and built an audience of thousands.

  • Views From The Captain’s Chair! Episode One: Do Your Time!

    Captains ChairBlog

    Ahoy, Mateys!

    Welcome to Episode One of… Views From The Captain’s Chair! (That greeting should echo in your head like The Muppets’ Pigs In Space! Or am I the only one that hears that?)

    In 2014 I have decided that some blogginess was needed. You know, because there isn’t enough blogginess out there. And certainly not enough blogginess about writing! Fo sho.

    Views From The Captain’s Chair will be a weekly blog dedicated to my views on being a writer in today’s suped-up, jetpackless 21st century. I’m not an expert, by any stretch of the imagination, but I am a professional writer working full time and have been professionally writing since 2009. That means I know enough to be dangerous, but not enough to be deadly. So sit back, relax (or freak out, it’s your life) and get ready for some words of wisdom as only a man that writes in a captain’s chair can give!

    Episode One: Do Your Time!

    Notice above how I mentioned I’ve been writing professionally since 2009? Yes, of course you noticed that. You’re not a moron. Right? Right… Anyhoodly-doo, that date is important to today’s post. Why? Because it means I have been writing professionally for about 5 years now. That’s key to what I will try to impart to you. So listen carefully.

    You don’t know shit as a writer until you have put in about 4-5 years of professional experience.

    That statement is going to rub some of you the wrong way. Against the grain. Opposite of the right way. Make you pull your hair, gnash your teeth, pee a little in your skinny jeans. That’s cool because I did the exact same thing when I was starting out (except for the skinny jeans thing. Ain’t no way you’ll squeeze my ass into skinny jeans. Not happening). I hated it when experienced writers said that it would take me 4-5 years to really get the hang of things. What the hell did they know? I was awesome! YOU CAN’T STOP AWESOME!

    Yet…

    Awesome aside, I was a rookie. A noob. A new fish. I thought I could buck the system. Beat the house. Another metaphor to fill space. I was wrong. You see, the idea that a writer needs about 4-5 years of experience before they “get it” doesn’t come from the industry. It isn’t from Big Publishing. It’s not The Man trying to keep The Writer down. Those words of wisdom come from -wait for it- OTHER WRITERS!

    Yes, folks, other writers. It isn’t some conspiracy to keep new writers under the thumb of publishers. It’s actual advice from colleagues and peers that have come before and already made all the mistakes you are about to make.

    Damn, sometimes I wish I had listened.

    But, nope, not me. I WAS AWESOME! So I plowed forward and made all the mistakes I was told I’d make. I rushed into things. Tried to force my first novel (Dead Mech) out there into the market by signing with the first publisher that came along and tickled my prostrate. Sure, it felt great, but it was over in a blink. And I didn’t even get dinner for my trouble. My bad. Big time.

    Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m glad I have done everything exactly as I have. I’m a fatalist that way. All events in my life have added up to this exact point. I’m writing full time and (so far) making a goo of it. [See the typo there? I said goo instead of go! But I left it in! When you have 4-5 years of writing experience you learn that’s comic gold! GOLD!] My mistakes have made me who I am. I embrace those mistakes like the bastard children they are.

    But, what if…?

    What if I’d listened to more experienced writers that gave me free advice with nothing but the good intentions they were meant to be? You know, instead of screaming in their faces, “I AM AWESOME!”. Well, for starters, I would have polished my manuscript. Worked out the kinks and flaws. Then submitted the manuscript to a few publishers. And waited. Like the rest of writing humanity. I could have been picked up by a publishing house that knew what it was doing. I could have learned from that experience. I could have launched my career with a nuclear KAPOW instead of a pew-pew. May have happened, may not have happened.

    But what did happen is I signed with the first publisher that smiled at me and said I was pretty. It wasn’t a bad experience. The publisher was very small press and very nice. But it could have been a disaster. I could have totally been taken advantage of and lost rights to my work. I dodged a bullet. I was lucky.

    Some of you reading this are wondering, “Wait, you sent off your first novel? Aren’t they supposed to suck?”. Sure, they can suck. Most do. Mine probably did. But, I’d battle tested it by podcasting the novel for free. I had the Internet on my side! THE INTERNET DOESN’T LIE! I have actually gone back and read some of that prose. It’s rookie prose, but I actually like it as a reader. So, yes, my first novel was ready. Just not ready ready.

    Here’s the thing, Mateys, if you get one thing out of this post it’s this: listen to those that have the experience. If they are willing to take the time out of their schedule to help you then you better damn well take that help and use it to the best of your ability. Whether you think you are ready or not, which you may be, you still don’t have 4-5 years of writing experience. You don’t have perspective.

    That perspective is what matters. It allows me to understand so much more about my writing, about the business of writing, about other writers, about quite a few things that are now getting thrown at me. If I didn’t have that perspective I’d be screwed. I wouldn’t know what is a good deal and what is a bad deal. I wouldn’t know what novel to tackle and what to set aside for a while. I wouldn’t know jack shit. Simple as that.

    So, to sum up: Do Your Time! Don’t rush anything because there is a faction of the writing population that says you don’t need to have experience, you can just puke out whatever, publish it yourself, and you are a writer! Which is partially true- as long as you are writing, you are a writer. But you’ll be a writer that lacks perspective. It’s the whole blind men and the elephant parable thingy. You’ll only know the trunk or the leg or the fat testes. You won’t know the whole animal. Which means you are one squeaky cartoon mouse away from getting your ass trampled to death.

    I don’t want that to happen. I want you to live! I want you to succeed! I want you to buy me bourbon when we meet at the next con bar. Make it a double, Mateys, because the Captain is thirsty!

    Cheers.

    Disclaimer: Views From The Captain’s Chair are just that: views. These are not laws. These are not set in stone. I could be totally wrong. I could be off my rocker (shut up). I could be full of S-H-I-T. I could change my mind next week. All of that is possible. Who knows? But if even just a little of this helps you then I’m happy with that. If it just makes you stop and think then I’ve done my job. Which I really need to get back to. Blogging don’t pay for the bourbon! Oh, and the whole Captain’s Chair thing? Yeah, I write in a captain’s chair. It’s true, Mateys! Got a question? Need some one on one? Shoot me an email, a DM, a PM (no BMs) or comment below.

    Jake Bible lives in Asheville, NC with his wife and two kids.

    A professional writer since 2009, Jake has a proven record of innovation, invention and creativity. Novelist, short story writer, independent screenwriter, podcaster, and inventor of the Drabble Novel, Jake is able to switch between or mash-up genres with ease to create new and exciting storyscapes that have captivated and built an audience of thousands.

  • The Next Way To Publish- We Have A Winner!

    Ok, the votes are in and they have been calculated, tabulated, added up, jotted down, and set aside. And I’ll admit it wasn’t a huge contest. At one point there I thought the winner might have a fight on its hands, but it pulled away in just a couple days of voting.

    The winner? The novel that I will right next? Natural Born Cyborgs!

    For those of you not familiar with what this novel will be about, here is a quick description:

    Natural Born Cyborgs–
    The techno-virus used by the Three hundreds of years ago has mutated and combined with BC (biochrome) to create a generation of natural born cyborgs- part biorganic metal, part human. Society decides these Splicers, as they are called, are too dangerous to let live and rounds them up for extermination. Those not found must hide their true natures and fight for their lives. And the lives of those yet born.
    Set in the same universe as DEAD MECH, but hundreds of years after the events in the Apex Trilogy, Natural Born Cyborgs is the first in the Splicer Wars series of novels that introduce the world to the new MechPunk style of science fiction- raw, unrelenting, brutal, and shiny.

    Sounds pretty good, eh? I think so. I can’t wait to write this puppy!

    Now, since we have the decision made I better explain how the rest of this will work. And don’t worry, I’ll explain again once I put the pre-order button up.

    This is how it will go:

    I am going to put up a pre-order page where folks can pre-order the project package.

    The project package will consist of: a limited edition, signed and numbered, hardcover of the novel. Both epub and mobi formats (signed also) of the ebook edition. The audiobook version of the novel.

    Cost will be: $50 per package for US customers, $75 for international (sorry about the high international price, but have you seen shipping costs lately? Sheesh!)

    Once I have enough pre-orders to fund the project I will start writing the novel. At this time it looks like I will need $2000. I know I had said $1600 in earlier posts (with disclaimers!), but I have had to come to the reality that if I want this to be a 100% professional quality project then I will have to spend the dollars on it. The money goes to formatting, editing, proofreading, hardcover cover design, ebook cover design, etc. Some of you know just how expensive that stuff is. Trust me, there is no profit margin here. All of this money goes to costs of production.

    Once I have finished writing the novel, and it is back from the editor, formatter, cover designer, and ready to go then it will go to print. AS LONG AS there are at least 75 pre-orders in place. This is how many are needed to start a print run and be able to break even with printing costs, audiobook duplication costs, and shipping. Every pre-order after 75 means I will actually make a little scratch. Which would be nice.

    What’s the time frame, you ask? That’s up to y’all.

    What dictates the time frame of this project are the three following key components: how soon production funding is attained, how soon I get the novel written and produced, and how soon we hit 75 pre-orders. You folks control two of those three things. And as for writing, well I write fast. If everything goes smoothly then there should be a finished novel and audiobook ready to go in no more than six months. That means ready in time for the holidays! Huzzah!

    What will I be doing while the pre-orders add up? I’ll be world building. This novel takes place hundreds of years after DEAD MECH. The world has evolved. Times have changed. Civilization has made a comeback, for sure. But will this new landscape be better than the wasteland? Wouldn’t you like to know!

    So stay tuned, folks. In the next couple of days I’ll announce the start of the pre-order extravaganza! Pre-orderpalooza! South By SouthPre-order! Pre-orderCon! …and I’m done.

    The last thing I have to do is thank each and every person that voted. Your participation made this happen. And I am blown away by the amount of support. Thank you to everyone that retweeted, posted, wrote about, stood on their roof and shouted, fed Paul E. Cooley the blood of the wicked so he wouldn’t try to eat my soul —you know, all that good stuff.

    Thank you!

    Oh, and writers? I’ll be doing a post later in the week with some insights into the process so far. There were some interesting patterns that I observed. It’ll be cool to talk about.

    And that’s it for now. Cheers!

  • The Next Way To Publish- Time to vote on the TOP THREE!

    Welcome to the Top Three novel pitches! These novels fought their way through the first round of ten and have come out triumphant! But, as you know, THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!

    So vote below and on Monday the 22nd of April I will announce the winner and that will be the novel I write next!

    But, before you vote, know this: I am letting people see the results as they happen this time. This way when you vote you will know what title is in the lead. Not the one you want? Then rally others to come and vote! Sway them towards your personal preference, make them see it your way, bring them into the light! In other words get your mom and cousin Nora to vote. It’s free.

    NOW VOTE!

    Natural Born Cyborgs–
    The techno-virus used by the Three hundreds of years ago has mutated and combined with BC (biochrome) to create a generation of natural born cyborgs- part biorganic metal, part human. Society decides these Splicers, as they are called, are too dangerous to let live and rounds them up for extermination. Those not found must hide their true natures and fight for their lives. And the lives of those yet born.
    Set in the same universe as DEAD MECH, but hundreds of years after the events in the Apex Trilogy, Natural Born Cyborgs is the first in the Splicer Wars series of novels that introduce the world to the new MechPunk style of science fiction- raw, unrelenting, brutal, and shiny.

    Big Box Blood Bath–
    The world outside BigMart is gone.
    No more.
    Adios.
    Kaput.
    Those left inside cannot leave.
    Ever.
    Naturally, real estate is divided and factions are formed upon the concrete and between the massive shelves of foodstuffs and durable goods.
    It’s men versus women, children versus the aged.
    And every aisle for itself!
    A gore-filled romp of Thunderdome meets The Mist all set in a Sam’s Club-style hell.

    PoDLanD–
    In The Retail States of America, the PoDs are everything. School, shopping, dining, and work are all done in the PoDs. Why go outside? Why ever leave a PoD? PoDs are life!
    But for Customer Service PoD Captain First Class Huxley Moore, the world tips upside down and Huxley finds himself, and his two other ComPoDres, flung out into the Wildz.
    Literally flung. Like their PoD was picked up and thrown out into the Wildz. Well, not really. More like a major system malfunction that activates their PoD’s escape protocols. Either way, not good.
    Now Huxley, and his ComPoDres, must drag their PoD through the Commune, the Coast, the Cascades, the Columbia, the Cartels, and the Capitol, in order to get back to the Customers they have sworn to protect and serve.
    Join Huxley in this science fiction satire as he fights his way back to his life in PoDLanD and discovers some truths along the way.