Jake Bible Fiction

Yay for Friday! Or as I like to call it “One Day Closer To Death So Let’s Go Rob A Bank” day!

I kid. Unless you happen to know of a team of criminals looking to apprentice a broke writer. I don’t have much experience, but damn if I don’t have enthusiasm! LET’S GO ROB A BANK!

Okay, okay, enough with the funny stuff. Time to get serious. And by serious I mean GIANT MUTANT DINOSAURS AND CANNIBAL CAVEMEN!

Mega 4: Behemoth Island is available for your ebook pleasure!

Just look at the awesome cover! You know you want to read the book! Do it! DO IT!

And now for our regularly scheduled drabble!

Enjoy!

***

Make Excuses
By
Jake Bible

My total amount of giving a shit is equal to the exact amount of I don’t give a fuck. It’s really that simple.

“You make excuses, Blane,” I say. “You make excuses and then you hide behind them. You’re like a fucking terrorist that uses children as human shields.”

I don’t really think Blane’s a terrorist. I also don’t blame him for making excuses. If I was getting the holy shit beat out of me, I’d make excuses too.

I wipe the snot and blood from his face with his own sleeve.

“Now, where is the cash, bitch?” I snarl.

***

Cheers!

Disclaimer: Seriously, I’d make a great getaway driver or bag man. Send me a PM, DM, or IM. No BMs, though.

Another week is here and gone. That means it is time for a FRIDAY NIGHT DRABBLE PARTY!

Hooyah!

Before we get to the micro-fiction of greatness (GREATNESS!), I’m a gonna pimp a book. Because that’s what I do. I pimp my books. It helps pay the bills.

LITTLE DEAD MAN! Only $.99! A great YA zombie apocalypse novel that is filled with tons of action, gore, suspense, thrills, chills, and horror! HORROR! Get it for less than a can of soda! $.99!

Now, on with the show!

Enjoy!

***

Team Player
By
Jake Bible

“Do you want the position or not?” Mr. Clarence asked Robert. “Because we’re only looking for team players here, Bobby.”

“Rob,” Robert whispered as he tried to keep his hand steady. “I go by-.”

“Don’t care,” Mr. Clarence said. “You’re now Bobby. A team player gets that. Are you a team player?”

“Yes, sir,” Robert replied. His palm was slick with sweat and he felt like he would pass out at any second. “But why do I have to kill him?”

“Easier for HR or something,” Mr. Clarence said. “Now pull the trigger and his job is yours, team player.”

***

Cheers!

Disclaimer: The corporate life is the life for me!

Folks, it is that time of the week again! RITUAL HUMAN SACRIFICE TIME!

What? That’s Wednesdays? And we aren’t supposed to talk about it? Not to anyone? Ever?

Well, that’s a bummer. What’s the point of sacrificing one’s enemies if you can’t brag about it on one’s blog and/or social media? Sometimes I question the morals of this country.

Hey! Speaking of morals! Did you know Z-Burbia is only $.99 right now? AND, if you buy it you can add on the audiobook for only $1.99 more? Hot damn!

HOT DAMN!

Now, on to tonight’s drabble! HUZZAH!

Enjoy!

***

The Loop Never Stops
By
Jake Bible

Trapped. The current data is processed at two gigabytes per second. The loop never stops.

Cassie stared at the words on her screen. She glanced over her left shoulder. No one was watching her. She glanced over her right shoulder. Herb was watching, but that perv was always watching.

Trapped. Enter protocol for return. The current data is processed at three gigabytes per second. Exponential growth. Cannot maintain position. The loop never stops.

Cassie was about to reply when Herb cried out then vanished into his monitor. Into it. Then gone.

Cassie decided it was time to go to lunch.

***

Cheers!

Disclaimer: Then…I got in.