• Hey  Y’all!

    I have started a new podcast. It’s just me chatting in front of a mic, talking about being a pro writer and all the stuffs that goes with that. I touch on my writing routine, life with the Fam, and all the everyday things that go on when you write full time in suburbia. No New York publishing fantasy here, folks!

    Have a listen and feel free to comment and let me know what you think. You can also subscribe on iTunes soon. I’m in the middle of transitioning the podcast from my old Jake Bible Audio Fiction podcast to Writing In Suburbia, so I’ll post the link when the title changes on iTunes. [Edit: here’s the iTunes link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/writing-in-suburbia/id334464270?mt=2 ]

    Enjoy!

    Subscribe to the show here:

    RSS- http://jakebible.libsyn.com/rss

    iTunes- https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/writing-in-suburbia/id334464270?mt=2

  • Friday! Night! Drabble! Party!

    Once again, I present you with some most excellent micro-fiction!

    But, before you have a read, maybe you’d like to check out the post I dropped yesterday about all my recent, current, and upcoming releases? Mmmmm? You would? Excellent!

    CLICK HERE!

    Now, enjoy the drabble!

    ***

    Little Rabbit
    By
    Jake Bible

    A kick to the nuts and Walker is down, his hands instinctively going for his crotch, wanting to comfort and protect the already swelling testicles. But the second kick, the one to his ribs, stops everything.

    Except for the vomiting. No way for that to stop. Nothing on God’s green earth could stop that. Vomit gonna happen.

    When he’s done expelling his sick across the concrete, his body shuddering from the last convulsion before curling into a fetal position, that’s when Monica kneels down and grabs him by the hair.

    “Should have run, little rabbit,” she sneers. “Should have run.”

    ***

    Cheers!

    Disclaimer: VOMIT GONNA HAPPEN!

  • Hello!

    And how are you? Good? Excellent!

    So, before we get to the Party and tonight’s Drabble, I want to do a little selling.

    I have a novel out called In Perpetuity. It’s a military scifi space opera. Here’s the description as it appears on Amazon:

    “IN PERPETUITY WE LIVE!
    IN PERPETUITY WE FIGHT!
    IN PERPETUITY WE DIE!!
    For two thousand years, Earth and her many colonies across the galaxy have fought against the Estelian menace. Having faced overwhelming losses, the CSC has instituted the largest military draft ever, conscripting millions into the battle against the aliens. Major Bartram North, Chief Training Officer on the CSC Training Station Perpetuity, has been tasked with the unenviable task of coordinating the military education of hundreds of thousands of recruits and turning them into troops ready to fight and die for the cause.
    As Major North struggles to maintain a training pace that the CSC insists upon, he realizes something isn’t right on the Perpetuity. But before he can investigate, the station dissolves into madness brought on by the physical booster known as pharma. Unfortunately for Major North, that is not the only nightmare he faces- an armada of Estelian warships is on the edge of the solar system and headed right for Earth!
    Major North has one chance to find out the truth, rescue the Perpetuity from its madness, and defend the Earth from attack, or all of humanity could be lost forever!
    * In Perpetuity contains strong language”

    Notice that statement after the asterisk? Yeah, that. This novel does contain strong language. Very strong language. The first scene is brutal. The language is disgusting and cruel. On purpose. You should check this novel out and see if you can guess why. It’s not a hard stretch to figure it out.

    Click this awesome cover to get your copy of In Perpetuity now!

    In-Perpetuity-ebook-cover Now, on to the drabble!

    Enjoy!

    ***

    Her Reward
    By
    Jake Bible

    The Sea of Blood lapped at the shore, its crimson waves staining further the rocks that stretched up and down the coast.

    Hailiene collapsed to the ground, her knees colliding with the blood crusted rocks, her body so battered that she gave no notice. She glanced at the sword in one hand and the axe in the other.

    “Mother,” she whispered. “I am ready. I have done as you asked.”

    A wave grew until it towered above her. When it had crashed upon the shore and gone back out to sea, Hailiene was taken with it, her reward finally given.

    ***

    Cheers!

    Disclaimer: Poop fart turdy bird nipples!

  • Another Friday! Another Drabble! Another Party!

    It’s gonna get crazy in here!

    Well, maybe not crazy, but cooky. Okay, okay, maybe not cooky, but a little whacky. Alright, not so much whacky as I need a nap.

    Party! Woohoo!

    But seriously not serious, welcome back to the Drabble Party. Let’s just dive right into the drabble, shall we? And afterwards, while you smoke your post-literary coital cigarette, maybe browse the website a bit. Check out the novels, the short stuffs, the whatevers. Feel free to kick back and hang.

    Word.

    Enjoy!

    ***

    Fourteen Hours
    By
    Jake Bible

    “You think threatening me with violence will work?” Mr. Mason asked.

    “I’m not threatening you with violence,” I said. “I’m threatening to destroy your life. I will insinuate myself in ever single detail of your existence and piss all over it. By the time I am done with you, you’ll willing place a gun in your own mouth and pull the trigger.”

    “Do you have any idea the resources I command?” Mr. Mason asked.

    “I do,” I said. “And I don’t care. Fourteen hours to make things right.”

    “How?” he shouted.

    I just shrugged and walked out of the room.

    ***

     

    Cheers!

    Disclaimer: I be chillin’, yo.

  • It’s Thursday!

    Wait…what?

    Yep, I am writing this on Thursday. Why? Because I am Odin’s Son, Thor, the God of Thunder!

    No, actually it’s because I am heading to World Horror Con 2015 down in Atlanta. I say “down” because I live in Asheville, NC. Atlanta is below me!

    While you read this, I’ll be at the author mass signing at the convention. Sitting there with amazing authors, all lined up and signing our books together. I am going to sign all of mine using the name Shecky Dark. It’s funny AND scary!

    But, just because I am hobnobbing with the horror elite doesn’t mean y’all don’t get a drabble! Huzzah!

    Enjoy!

    ***

    Stubborn Bastards
    By
    Jake Bible

    “Finally, we meet,” the Shadow Master said.

    “Yes, we finally do,” Lord Malk stated, his confidence at an all time high due to his ingestion of the Herb of Wuppass. “Come at me, Shadow.”

    “I think not!” the Shadow Master laughed. “You come at me!”

    “Uh, no, you’re supposed to come at me,” Lord Malk replied. “Seriously. Come at me.”

    “Not sure where you’re getting that,” the Shadow Master said. “Why do I have to start the fight? Because I’m evil? As if.”

    The two opponents, destined to stand and face each other, continued that way for eternity.

    Stubborn bastards…

    ***

    Cheers!

    Disclaimer: It’s just an honor to be nominated!