Yo! What’s up, Party People? You ready for some drabbletastic delights? Yeah, you are!
Of course, before we get to the 100 Words of Awesome, we must first explore all the goodness that has been delivered to the internet this week by yours truly. By me, in case the yours truly thing doesn’t translate to your culture/generation/species/etc.
And I also uploaded a new video to my YouTube Writing Advice series. Checking that out is something else you should do. Right now. Go check it out. Do it. You wanna, you know it. Do it. Come on.
As always, I gotta shill me some Max Rage: Intergalactic Badass! If you haven’t read it then get on that! If you have read it then please leave a review! REVIEW!
Now, on with the drabble!
Not For Me
Hailey studied the ancient inscription, staring at it for hours before finally uncurling her legs from under her to stand. The numbness that spread in her limbs threatened to topple her into the dirt and musky flowers that surrounded the broken idol.
“Miss?” Algernon asked. “Have you found what you seek?”
Hailey smiled a sad, knowing smile at her assistant.
“I did, Al,” Hailey said. “But what I found is not for me.”
Hailey picked up her bag, shooing Algernon’s hands away from the canvas sack, and hiked back into the jungle to reverse the trek she’d spent months taking.
Disclaimer: My leg’s asleep!
YOU! YES, YOU!
Hold on, let me turn the volume down… There we go. Let’s try this again…
You! Yes, you! You have not purchased Max Rage. I am disappointed. It’s great. The perfect summer fun read. All kinds of action and adventure, foul language and sex, many a pun and bad joke. Get on it!
Here is a picture to click to assist you in your purchasing of Max Rage: Intergalactic Badass!
Now, I bet you want a drabble? Huh? Did you click the pic and buy Max Rage? I’ll wait. I have all the time in the world.
Okay, on with the drabble!
“All eighty-five dead!” Wilson called out from the bottom of the chasm. “Eighty-five!”
Melors and Ralf stared down into the darkness while Crispin shook his head.
“Melors?” Crispin asked. “You ready?”
“Eighty-five, man,” Melors replied.
“It’s what you’re here for,” Ralf said.
“I know!” Melors shouted then calmed herself. “I know. But eighty-five? That’s a lot of meat.”
“We didn’t chase them here to take their wallets,” Crispin said. “You’re the professional butcher.”
Melors looked to Ralf, but he couldn’t meet her eye.
“Stupid apocalypse,” Melors muttered, stepping onto the chasm’s rope ladder. “I miss McDonalds.”
Disclaimer: You know what to do!
Yo! Welcome to the Friday after 4th of July!
For those not in the US of A, we call this Friday “Stop shooting off fireworks, you dumb redneck sons of bitches!”.
But, despite being an Intergalactic Badass, Max Rage needs your help! The ebook is hovering in the charts. Not going up, not going down, just hovering. If y’all could buy a copy and give a little nudge, that’d be awesome. And, if you’ve already bought the ebook then please leave a review! Reviews are the lifeblood of authors!
Now, click the giant pic and get you some Max Rage: Intergalactic Badass!
Did ya click? I sure hope so. I sure hope so…
Kitteridge never met a fight he didn’t want to join.
So, upon seeing the melee occurring just outside the door to his hotel, Kitteridge simply could not help himself.
The first person he encountered tried to snap his wrist. Kitteridge was having none of that. A strike to the throat brought a slow death.
The second person had a weapon. A lead pipe. Kitteridge found this infinitely amusing and laughed as he took the pipe and crushed the man’s head.
The third person had a pistol. He shot Kitteridge.
“A pistol. How droll,” were Kitteridge’s last words.
How droll indeed.
Disclaimer: Did ya click?
I am so glad you made it past the swamp monster, climbed the trellis of really sharp thorns, fought the mugwomp, and leapt over the fire of questionable heat! Sorry for all the security measures, but you gotta protect against so many trolls these days, am I right?
Hey! You know who doesn’t need protection? MAX RAGE: INTERGALACTIC BADASS!
The reviews are coming in and folks are loving them some Rage!
“This was a fun, raunchy, kick arse book…..plain and simple.“
“This was such a fun read!!“
“Max Rage doesn’t disappoint! From beginning to end, the storyline is chalk-full of action, violence, coarse language, and a fair amount of hilariously random farting.”
I’m super proud of the random farting. 🙂
Get Max Rage: Intergalactic Badass now!
Now, on with the drabble!
“First step skipped. Third gate on the right. Duck.”
Lionel held the weathered piece of paper and read the line of instructions over and over, the dark tunnel waiting before him. Lightning flashed over the snow capped mountains far behind. Five seconds later, thunder rolled, shaking the air and making Lionel jump.
“Ok. I can do this. Just follow the instructions and I’ll be fine.”
He knelt and made sure his boot laces were tied tight then stood again, sighed, and walked into the tunnel.
He screamed the entire three hundred feet down.
He forgot to skip the first step.
Disclaimer: You can’t run from the Rage!
Is it Friday already? Woo, this week flew by, y’all. At least for me.
So, how are y’all doing?
Okay, enough about you. How about we talk about Max Rage: Intergalactic Badass! Check the cover below! Click the cover below! Buy the book!
Also, I dropped a new video in my YouTube Writing Advice series. Check it out!
What else? Hmmm, oh, yes, tonight’s drabble!
“Huh? Hand me that saw.”
“Mungo Jerry. That’s the guy that sang Summertime.”
“Pretty sure Summertime was from Porgy and Bess. Hand me the saw, dude.”
“Here. Porgy and Bess? What the hell is that?”
“Cute. Need that length of chain there, too. No. Yeah, that one.”
“That’s a lot of blood.”
“Yeah, my bad.”
“In The Summertime! That’s the name. Is the Gershwin one that Janice Joplin song, too?”
“Yeah. What’s the other one? Screwdriver.”
“Here. You know. Some sixties song where he goes da doo dah dah a bunch.”
“Right. I like that one.”
Disclaimer: No one ignores Max Rage!