• It’s the first Drabble Party of February!

    This has zero significance, but I am a sucker for any reason to use an exclamation point!

    Sooooo, how’s y’all doin’? Ready for 100 words of pure magic? I know you are!

    Enjoy!

    ***

    Nothing Ever Good
    By
    Jake Bible

     

    They were dragging him. They were dragging him through the wet grass and across the field. That he knew.

    He tried to roll his head to the side to see who had him by his left arm, but the paralytic, he assumed it was a paralytic, wouldn’t relinquish control, so his head merely hung backwards, the back of his skull bonking across the clods of earth and grass.

    Chanting or singing or incanting or whatever began and he knew he was totally screwed.

    Nothing good ever came from chanting or singing or incanting or whatever.

    Then he felt the flames.

    ***

     

    Cheers!

    Disclaimer: Careful what you drink.

  • The Idea.

    *cue fanfare*

    The idea is what starts it all. Without the idea then the project never happens. Every novel or story has to have that spark, that catalyst that drives the creation of the work. Without the idea you are flying blind. (Unless flying blind is the idea, but that’s a whole other post).

    So…where does the idea come from?

    Good question. For you? I have no idea (see what I did there?). For me? Read on!

    Everyone’s idea generator (available at Home Depot for $99.99 after rebate) is different. Some folks wake up in the middle of the night and write it down only to get up the next day with zero recollection of the nocturnal inspiration. Some get inspired by other works or by the Muse (available at Pier One Imports for $35.99 plus tax). Many struggle through several variations on a theme of an idea until the final one solidifies. Others it just “comes” to them fully formed. And drugs. Let’s not forget drugs. Each artist is different.

    For me, I tend to get my ideas right before bed. They slam into my semi-awake head and I write them down. I always write them down! There is nothing more disappointing than knowing you had a great idea the night before but can’t figure out what it was. I actually had that happen a couple weeks ago. I wrote down the title, without any description, then had no idea the next day what the actual meat of the idea was. Bummer.

    Now, pre-sleepytime ideas are not my only source of inspiration. I’ll have conversations with friends and they’ll be talking about something unrelated to horror or scifi and my brain will latch on and say, “Huh. What if blah blah was actually blah blah?” Many times I get blank, but polite, stares. Sometimes I get head nods. Every once in a while I get the “you should totally do that” high five. Hell, I have an idea right now that will probably become a series next year that I got from a friend. He had an idea, gave it to me, and I fleshed it out and will be running with it! Yay for friends!

    Oh, and don’t start whining about “being original” because that is bullshit. There hasn’t been an original idea since man started telling stories around the cave fire. And even back then the stories were probably handed down by our alien overlords that seeded the planet. Derivative is fine, as long as it is good and it is marketable.

    And, being in the scifi/horror/thriller genre, which are all pretty derivative, I have been known to get my ideas by mashing up two or three other ones into a new form that hasn’t been done before.

    Case in point: Dead Mech (available on Amazon for $2.99).

    When I got the idea for Dead Mech, I was watching TV and the Transformers 2 commercial came on. Regardless of your opinion of the franchise, those freakin’ robots are pretty awesome. Seeing those guys led my brain to connect to the old MechWarrior and BattleTech games that I never played, but always wanted to. Gundam probably hopped in my noggin as well. Those thoughts instantly melded with my desire to write a zombie novel, but in a way that hadn’t been done before. Bing, bang, boom, a few seconds later it all coalesced into the idea of what would happen if a mech pilot died in his/her mech and turned into a zombie. Dead Mech was born!

    Other times the ideas come from outside sources. Take Z-Burbia, for instance. My publisher, Severed Press, wanted a “straight up, Romero-esque” zombie series. My first reaction was that it had been done so much there was no way I could bring anything new to it. Then the “write what you know” adage smacked me upside my head and I realized that the beauty of Romero is that he is commenting on the American Way, using zombie horror as almost satire. Dawn of the Dead was set in a mall to mock consumerism. What if I set my series in the same type of suburban subdivision I lived in and mocked the pointless crap that goes with that?

    Bam! Z-Burbia, baby!

    Mega (available at Amazon for $2.99)? How did I get the idea for Mega? Again, Severed Press wanted some deep sea thrillers and sea monster horror novels. Giant, prehistoric sharks are always a good fit for that kind of stuff. But, I didn’t just want the same old “scientist finds shark, shark eats everyone until scientist kills shark” novel. (For the record, despite some of Mega’s reviews, I have never read MEG by Steve Alten. Didn’t know it existed until well after I wrote the first Mega novel and saw it mentioned in a review).

    Again, as with Dead Mech, I decided to meld genres. I took the giant shark, deep sea horror novel, and mixed it with the elite team of badass fighters novel. Team Grendel was born. Why did I go that route? Because I saw how successful the elite team stuff was for authors like Jonathan Maberry and Jeremy Robinson, just to mention a couple. I turned a horror novel into an action adventure thriller novel and it has certainly paid off.

    This brings up another way to get ideas: the charts. No, seriously. If you aren’t sure what to write, but are burning to write something, then look at the bestseller charts on Amazon. See what is selling there and if anything piques your interest then go for it!

    Which leads me to my last part about ideas: it’s okay to think of marketing. I have dozens and dozens of ideas for novels, but only a couple are worth pursuing. For me, there is zero point in wasting my time writing a novel if I don’t think it will sell. And I’m not talking about it selling to a publisher, I’m talking about it selling to readers. Because that’s what really matters.

    Think of it like this: you’re a chef and you have an amazing idea for a dessert. You know it will be delicious, you know once folks try it they will be blown away. Only problem is it is banana cheddar spinach pudding. It may be the most awesome pudding ever made in the history of awesome puddings, but no human being is going to order that off the menu. Same goes for novel ideas. Thinking of marketability is totally cool.

    Are there more ways to get ideas? Hell yes! The ethereal idea machine hovers above us all and drops little nuggets constantly in an infinite number of ways. The trick is to tune your senses to pick up those nuggets. Just like the act of writing, the act of generating ideas takes practice and patience. You have to be willing to churn out some crap ideas before you find that golden nugget. And it is okay to churn out crap as long as you keep on churning!

    Still don’t know how to get an idea for your breakthrough novel? Then maybe that is the idea in of itself right there. Think on that for a second and see where it takes you. You never know what you will find in the most unlikely of places. The real point is that ideas come from everywhere and eventually, as long as you don’t quit, “your” idea will happen!

    Cheers!

  • ARE YOU READY FOR SOME DRABBLE?

    *cue ridiculous theme song music and fake patriotism*

    What?

    Time for more free micro-fiction, y’all! I’m not gonna shill much except to say thank you to everyone that has picked up Z-Burbia 5: The Bleeding Heartland! It’s charting right now which makes for a happy Jake on a happy Friday!

    Now, how’s about we get to the drabble!

    Enjoy!

    ***

    The Crowd Waited
    By
    Jake Bible

    The gladiators faced each other.

    “I don’t want to fight you,” one said.

    “I don’t want to fight you, either,” the other replied.

    “They’ll kill us if we don’t,” the first said.

    “One of us has to die anyway,” the second replied.

    “Well, I don’t want it to be me,” the first said.

    “I don’t want it to be me,” the second responded.

    The gladiators faced each other, neither of them making a move.

    “Sooooo…where are we with this?” the first asked.

    “Hell if I know,” the second shrugged. “We fight?”

    “Do we?” the first asked.

    The crowd waited.

    ***

    Cheers!

    Disclaimer: Foosball!

  • Really, I have nothing to say in this post, I just wanted to use the title “Hit or Myth”. Seriously, it was too good of a pun not to use. Is it a true pun, though? Or just a play on words? Or are they one and the same?

    Answer: I don’t care, I like it.

    Which brings me to the real meat of this post: the first draft.

    There are a lot of very good writing resources, and very good writers, that state the first draft of a novel sucks. It blows. It is nothing but pure, unadulterated, uncut, shite. And they aren’t wrong. This post is not here to disprove that notion. Although I haven’t read many writers’ first drafts, so I cannot so for certain whether or not they do suck the hairy nuts of a ripe and smelly yeti.

    But what I can say is mine don’t.

    Don’t get me wrong, my first drafts can party with the best of them; they know the beauty of some good sweaty yeti nut suckage (Don’t we all?). It’s just that my first drafts aren’t the type of drafts that need to be ripped apart and then pieced back together. At this point in my career and writing experience, my first drafts are about 85% to 95% solid (with the exception of commas. I am comma illiterate,).

    It’s that last little 5% to 15% that has the bees on their knees taking it from that sweaty yeti (I have no idea what that means, but it was fun to write!). Those bits and pieces of the first draft that don’t quite fit, that are out of context, that ruin the pacing, that are so factually incorrect that I have to wonder if someone didn’t sneak in and write those parts without my knowing. For me, those are the things I fix.

    I don’t go back in and rip out this chapter or rearrange that chapter. I don’t cut characters and switch others’ motivations. I don’t suddenly decide that the setting should be the surface of mars instead of the surface of the moon. I just don’t do that. The novel I write is the novel I intend to turn in to my publisher. Why would I spend all of that time writing only to toss out what I’ve written and start over? That’s crazy talk.

    Now, to be honest, there is that time thing. My 2014 schedule was writing a 75K word novel a month. Which is totally doable, by the way (I’ll save the details on that process for a different post). But a novel a month pace means I didn’t have the luxury of trashing my first version and starting over or Frankensteining the shit out of it until it’s a new creature. The novels were the novels and fixing the boo boos was my only solution.

    That kind of pressure, and constraint, means I’ve gotten pretty damn good at sorting out my thoughts as I write. Do I outline? Somewhat. But I always deviate from the outline eventually. The story goes where the story goes. Yet I never try to force the story in any particular direction. That’s why, when it’s all said and done, the draft I have is pretty much what’s getting published.

    But, what about my first novels? What about those novels that came before all my experience with cranking out pulpy goodness?

    Same process. I’ve always been this type of writer. Even with my very first novel, Dead Mech, the version that was podcast was the version that has been published. First draft. Now, I did a LOT of editing along the way with that one because it was a drabble novel. Each section was tightened as I went. So there is that. But my second novel, third, fourth, fifth novels, all had one draft that I fixed and tweaked slightly then turned in. Done!

    Would I go back and fix some stuff in those novels? Maybe. I’m sure I could. But why? I have great feedback on them and even if I did fix some things there will always be people that will find fault.

    And that’s the key! There will always be people that find fault!

    Trying to write the perfect novel is impossible. Impossible, I say! Why? Because reading is subjective. Once you are done and that puppy gets put out there then it’s up to the individual interpretations of the readers. And boy will they interpret! You could work for hours and hours, days and days, on a specific chapter, fine tuning it until it sings and there will still be folks that say, “Meh”.

    That’s the biz.

    And I guess that’s the main reason I don’t go back and rework everything: who’s to say the new version is better? I can’t. I’m too close to it. So I fix the typos (except the commas, because I just, can’t) look for continuity issues and then I’m done.

    Done. Wipe my hands of it and hit send to my publishers. Bam!

    What does this mean for you as a writer (if, in fact, you are a writer that is reading this)? It means your process is your process and if you feel good about your first draft then don’t mess with it. It’s okay to like it and think it isn’t a piece of shite. It also means it’s okay to hate it and shred it. Your process. Yours. No one else’s.

    Of course, this doesn’t mean you crank out a crap manuscript and then argue with the world when they say it’s crap. Keeping a first draft means the first draft has to actually be good. That’s the catch. Just because you wrote it doesn’t mean it’s readable. But with experience you learn what works and what doesn’t. I have more than a few incomplete manuscripts I’ve ditched because I knew I was wasting my time on something that wasn’t any good.

    Did any of this help? I hope so. At the very least I want to expand your concepts of what can and can’t be done when it comes to your writing process. Want a quick hint? Anything can be done. There is no can’t. There’s just quality. And readers are the final judge of that.

    So, that’s about it for this week. Next week I think I’ll dive into my actual step by step process of how I write a novel, from idea to submission.

    Cheers!

     

     

     

  • Oh, hello. I didn’t see you there. Come in, come in. What? This? Oh, it’s just the FRIDAY NIGHT DRABBLE PARTY!

    Free micro-fiction in your FACE!

    How’s ya’ll doin’? Good? Excellent!

    Now, as I sometimes do, I have a few announcements before getting into the nitty, the gritty, itty bitty fiction that is tonight’s drabble. What announcements? I’m glad you asked.

    Announcement Numero Uno: I’m on the Bram Stoker Awards preliminary ballot! Huzzah! To be more precies, my YA novel, Intentional Haunting, is on the prelim ballot for Superior Achievement in a Young Adult Novel. This is not a nomination, just a preliminary ballot. If I make it to the final ballot then I will be officially nominated. Still, pretty freakin’ cool!

    Announcement Numero Dos: Don’t forget that Kaiju Storm is now available. It’s all ebooky and printy and ready for your eyeholes to devour! DEVOUR!

    Announcement Numero Tres: Z-Burbia 5: The Bleeding Heartland is published, bitches! Uh, I mean the “bitches” part in a friendly way. We can call each other bitches, right? I think we’re at that point in our relationship. And look at the cover! Suh-weeeeeet! Click that puppy and go get ya some more of the Stanfords and their nightmarish, post-apocalyptic lives!

    2015-01-18 14.50.04

    Now, onto the drabble!

    Enjoy!

    ***

    Consider
    By
    Jake Bible

    “Consider what you are about to embark upon,” the colonel said. “This is not a plane ride across the world. This is not a vacation on a cruise ship. This is deep space. And when you wake up, all of your family and friends will be long dead. Even the Earth may not exist anymore.”

    They stood there, eyes locked onto the colonel as the man paced back and forth before them. The colonel stopped and turned then looked upon the massive rocketship that stood ready on the launchpad.

    “Damn,” he said. “I’d give anything to go with you. Anything.”

    ***

    Cheers!

    Disclaimer: BITCHES!